Grace is in learning when to shift gears

I have always wanted to live and grow older with grace!  Probably this has to do with my convent school upbringing where grace was an essential part of being a lady :)

I have always been that person who prefers to have everything under her control, the person who always knew what she had to do and who progressed towards those goals, personal or professional, with gusto. The one giving directions, supporting others not as focussed and encouraging them to keep moving. More or less, always in top gear - sometimes even when I might have liked a breather! 

And then I decided to move onto a new chapter and life taught me new lessons. I grew. 

Any journey can never be always on top gear - it shouldn't. The other gears are there for appropriate reasons and they need to be used when the time is right. 

I learnt, at work, to step back gradually when the young and the restless were keen to take on the reigns. Holding on then would have been perceived as resisting change and we all know that is a constant. Instead, I chose to partner with the younger leaders from the sidelines and found them coming to me more. I shifted to a lower gear, happy to share my advise when solicited and I learned about a new business world, the new ways of working. I believe I acted with grace. I still get the occasional call for guidance / support, which I think, is testament to that fact. 

On a personal front, I took many steps back as my role as a parent, provider, general guide was clearly diminishing fast since the last couple of years. That job of mine was done mostly - and whilst, I will always be a parent till I live - I don't think influencing my daughter's choices was anymore my business. Yes, always happy to discuss and share what my years have taught me but I knew my role was more in the supporting category here - to watch her journey from the sidelines, cheering her along whenever she needed it. I needed to be just there for her, not in her face! Again, I shifted to a much lower gear. Once again, I think I acted with grace! And she still lives with me and is actually a partner, a friend and a shoulder for me, now. Wherever her life takes her, going forward, I don't see that changing. 

So what about living a much slower life, mostly away from the spotlight? 

Why is the initial feeling I mostly encounter that the best parts are over and one must make the best of circumstances hereafter? 

This slower pace of life can be beautiful too - even the best so far - if we first stop looking back and then chart out a new roadmap - learn to relish the slower pace and fill our hours with a bit of passion, hobbies, new learnings and sharing what life has taught us to those that are eager to hear. Not very easy if one doesn't give it much thought when life is going at its fastest pace. This life, to be truly enjoyed and be meaningful, needs planning and thought - just as any other phase of our lives do. 

Fear of living a different kind of life should never keep one from fearing to switch to a lower  gear - and waiting for a health scare or a layoff or a organisational restructure to trigger this is far from ideal. 

Grace is knowing yourself when it is time - for designing your new chapter, for starting to let go of the last one. Holding on to what you have always known and are comfortable with, causes more stress than you realize  and you, more often than not, miss out on those many moments that make life truly beautiful and meaningful. 

To those of us who are at this stage of our lives, I wish you courage and faith  - to let go of known shores  and to discover new again. You have done it before, you can always do it again. 

“You should always know when you’re shifting gears in life. You should leave your era; it should never leave you.”

— Leontyne Price