Let's not lie to ourselves .....
Even if you are not Pinocchio, you should not lie.....
Lying is "wrong" - I was taught very early in my life. And having grown up in a convent, I believed it. I had this mental picture of an angel making a note, disapprovingly, every time I said or did something I shouldn't have, and was very worried that, at the end, my report card would not look very good. Back in those days, report cards mattered .....and I generally made sincere attempts to keep mine reasonable clean!
Life, over the years, has taught me to be more ...."realistic" shall we say?
I have learnt that while lying is still "bad" (and those counts upstairs still unsettle me)....sometimes it is necessary, it happens - yes, its always a choice; but sometimes, that choice is dictated by factors that make the lying bit not so evil. And I am not only talking of "white lies" here.....
So yes, I now do have my fair share of black ticks or dots against my name in that report card that will face me when one day, Life is tired of me......but one thing I practice religiously till today is that I do not "lie" to myself.
It's actually not as simple as it may sound - and it takes a lot of courage and spunk at times - to be able to face the truth yourself...when staying away in denial keeps you in what seems like a "comfort zone" - somewhat buffered from an uncomfortable reality.
But I thank God for giving me that courage, that strength of mind and that resolve to being able to look at myself in the mirror and say I have nothing to hide from you, I acknowledge where I stand, how I stand and I "accept" me as I am, with no buffers. Somehow this gives me great strength.
I have learnt to face the Truth always and accept it ( honestly, we don't really have a choice there, do we? ) even if it is bitter at times ..... Then I chose to deal with that bitter truth and that's where I do have a choice - in selecting my reactions to that situation.....it helps me feel a bit more in command and I actually end of dealing with the whole situation a bit better than I initially thought I would.
I see a lot of people around me who shy away from what is actually staring them in the eye - only because it unsettles them, even scares them, maybe brings them face to face with a reality they'd rather not deal with ....but honestly, I believe however good you get at lying to others, its very difficult to really lie to yourself. Do those little noises inside their heads ever go away completely? Do they not keep coming back and making a mess inside - sometimes when you least expect them? I think they do!
There may be many who will disagree with me - pointing out examples of people who are very successful at camouflaging the Truth, even to themselves - so much so that they may have even started believing in their "superficial" realities.
But I say no, they cannot be truly happy, truly at peace....do they sleep peacefully at night? Undisturbed, content? I doubt.
Is it worth it all? I doubt again.
So, let's not lie to ourselves about our worth, our credibility, our relationships, our faiths and values.
Let's all have the courage to face the Truth atleast within ourselves and then learn to deal with it through choices we make - that will keep our self - esteem intact, our heads high and our value systems aloft, that will allow us to deal with most "sticky" situations better and emerge a winner, still!
― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov
Lying is "wrong" - I was taught very early in my life. And having grown up in a convent, I believed it. I had this mental picture of an angel making a note, disapprovingly, every time I said or did something I shouldn't have, and was very worried that, at the end, my report card would not look very good. Back in those days, report cards mattered .....and I generally made sincere attempts to keep mine reasonable clean!
Life, over the years, has taught me to be more ...."realistic" shall we say?
I have learnt that while lying is still "bad" (and those counts upstairs still unsettle me)....sometimes it is necessary, it happens - yes, its always a choice; but sometimes, that choice is dictated by factors that make the lying bit not so evil. And I am not only talking of "white lies" here.....
So yes, I now do have my fair share of black ticks or dots against my name in that report card that will face me when one day, Life is tired of me......but one thing I practice religiously till today is that I do not "lie" to myself.
It's actually not as simple as it may sound - and it takes a lot of courage and spunk at times - to be able to face the truth yourself...when staying away in denial keeps you in what seems like a "comfort zone" - somewhat buffered from an uncomfortable reality.
But I thank God for giving me that courage, that strength of mind and that resolve to being able to look at myself in the mirror and say I have nothing to hide from you, I acknowledge where I stand, how I stand and I "accept" me as I am, with no buffers. Somehow this gives me great strength.
I have learnt to face the Truth always and accept it ( honestly, we don't really have a choice there, do we? ) even if it is bitter at times ..... Then I chose to deal with that bitter truth and that's where I do have a choice - in selecting my reactions to that situation.....it helps me feel a bit more in command and I actually end of dealing with the whole situation a bit better than I initially thought I would.
I see a lot of people around me who shy away from what is actually staring them in the eye - only because it unsettles them, even scares them, maybe brings them face to face with a reality they'd rather not deal with ....but honestly, I believe however good you get at lying to others, its very difficult to really lie to yourself. Do those little noises inside their heads ever go away completely? Do they not keep coming back and making a mess inside - sometimes when you least expect them? I think they do!
There may be many who will disagree with me - pointing out examples of people who are very successful at camouflaging the Truth, even to themselves - so much so that they may have even started believing in their "superficial" realities.
But I say no, they cannot be truly happy, truly at peace....do they sleep peacefully at night? Undisturbed, content? I doubt.
Is it worth it all? I doubt again.
So, let's not lie to ourselves about our worth, our credibility, our relationships, our faiths and values.
Let's all have the courage to face the Truth atleast within ourselves and then learn to deal with it through choices we make - that will keep our self - esteem intact, our heads high and our value systems aloft, that will allow us to deal with most "sticky" situations better and emerge a winner, still!
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